:: NOTHING OTHERS DO IS BECAUSE OF YOU miguel ruiz
Today's pearl is not a parenting pearl per se, but it is something to keep in mind when our children are having a melt down or telling us they hate us. Nothing others do is because of you so don't take it personally. Don't take anything personally is actually the second agreement from Ruiz's book The Four Agreements. I haven't read this book for a while but I love it. It really helped me to let go of things a lot easier because I didn't have to take things personally. I realized that whatever it was someone else did that might have upset me, wasn't actually about me, it was about them.
So when it comes to our children, if your child is pushing limits it could be because he is hungry, tired, frightened, unwell or any number of other reasons. Young children have immature impulse control and as noted by Janet Lansbury they "...are easily overwhelmed by impulses bigger and stronger than they are."
Today (two days ago!): can I even remember?! Charlie and Mia still unwell, we spent the morning trying to get an appointment somewhere and ended up in Midland seeing a homeopath. In the confined space of the homeopaths office it was clear to see that while Charlie is not ADD (I hope) he certainly is a very busy boy. I had thoughts of a pinball bouncing around, and that parenting such high energy kid has perhaps required more than I've given myself credit for. From there my mum took him and I went off running errands with Mia. No parenting dramas, Mia just didn't want to be put down which makes anything but baby holding difficult.